A Word about Diaper shorts (aka Bike Shorts)

***If the words "camel" and "toe" used in tandem offend you, please do not read further**

So as I mentioned a few blogs ago, I purchased a pair of the most padded bike shorts I could find a few weeks ago.

In case you need a visual of diaper bike shorts, here is a photo of me the day I got them. We had gone out so i was wearing my cowboy boots and a cute pink top -- probably not what i'll have on the day of the race, though i do realize it's a hot look. :)

As it turned out, we didn't bike last weekend, so I missed out on the chance to wear them. No such luck today.

We had our first "brick", which means you bike and bike and bike, and then hop off your bike and attempt to run...it's just working on the transition part of the triathlon and it is one of the hardest things. But to that point in a moment.

My new bike shorts are INSANE. They are gel padded and super super bulky. Issue # one is this: there is the appearnce of major camel toe from the padding splittling off down either thigh. Seriously, I'd have an immediate appointment with a plastic surgeon if it was an accurate outline of my special parts (maybe not my dad for this one though, lol), but IT'S NOT. So dude, stop looking at my (faux) cameltoe.

Second of all, there is the wedgie factor. You get it on both ends and it ain't fun. You kind of assume that a pad that thick won't be able to work it's way up into your crack. You'd be wrong. I don't like having a normal underwear wedgie, let alone an atomic maxi-pad one. And picking the pad outta your heinie isn't so graceful no matter how you angle your body.

Finally, there's the padding issue. There was no pad in the ONE PLACE THAT MY a*s WAS HITTING THE SEAT. I blame the seat - it's old and on a bike I bought off craigslist for $100...but it still annoys...or chafes.... All that padding and waddling and butt picking and I still need to build up my own special callous that you can't buy at any sports store. Dammit.

But at the end of the day, I did my 13+ mile bike ride, followed by a 5 minute jog, and thus my first brick is complete. ta da.

My next purchase will be tri shorts which allegedly sport more of a panti-liner than super maxi-pad inside and can be used for all 3 phases of the race.